I find it hard to understand how a week can be filled with so much fun, so many great activities…
and yet be the hardest week (emotionally) for me to go through since February.
Amidst the insecurity and self-hatred were dinners at my professor’s house, getting placed at the school I wanted for student teaching, karaoke, disneyland, birthdays, finishing my 1st quarter, seeing people finish college, steak, lovely ladies, fun boys, and my boy.
I’m… so… thankful? But more confused and aching than anything else.
I’ve been up for days, I finally lost my mind,
and then I lost my way, I’m blistered but I’m better
and I’m homeI’ll crawl, there’s thing that aren’t worth giving up I know,
but I won’t let this get me,
I will fight, you live the life you’re given with the storms outside,
some days all I do is watch the skyI think I, I could use a little break
But today was a good day
Thankful for you people who will put up with me and listen to me and help me make sense of it all.
Thankful that I think I can figure this mess out and rid myself of the self-loathing if I figure out how to truly give it up.
Thankful for Winter Break. Crossing my fingers for a bit of actual Winter (which is pretty much guaranteed since we’re going to Utah), and a bit of an actual break.
