Changeable.net

Alright, so it’s time for a better update about Oregon.

Oregon was real nice, real green, very beautiful. It was sort of rainy while we were there, but I’m not one to be bothered by that. The flights there were fine, but it was funny, the plane that took us between Seattle and Portland was TINY, I was amused. There were a lot of houses that were two stories high, with a big attic that would count as a third, and full basements. It was wierd to me because I’m used to seeing a bunch of one and two story houses. The houses there were cheap too. Like, there were these new houses (the subdevelopments in which all the houses look the same….), that in southern california cost like $500,000 for the small ones… though I wouldn’t necessarily pick one of these houses to live in, it was crazy, in Oregon, the biggest models were like $240,000. Crazy stuff.

As far as the college visitation went… it went well. The campus is so gorgeous. The people are nice. I went to a non-verbal communications class, and it was very fun. If money was not an obstacle and the school wasn’t so far, I would definitely go to it. But in the end, going to visit the school didn’t help sway my decision to go there any more or less.

The other interesting part of the trip was travelling while sick. I got progressively worse each day, and the flights back home weren’t so great because the changing air pressure hurt my ears A LOT. Today was I was at my sickest point yet. I’ve been on chicken soup, jello, “arroz con leche,” cranberry juice, and LOTS of water the whole day. I feel a little better now in some aspects, but worse in others.

Oh oh oh. And I think my new piercing is rejecting. Which is really scaring me. I think my immune system is going crazy trying to fight off my flu, and it’s trying to get rid of this piercing too. I don’t want it to come down to it, but I’m about this [ ] close to taking it out. I probably should have done those sea salt soaks. I didn’t know what sea salt was though.

Sorry if I’m whiney, I just feel like crap. Hopefully tomorrow I’ll be better. And then I can go to It’s a Grind. Because I haven’t been since saturday and I am having serious withdrawls, I need to see some people there ASAP.

I just wish the three of us hadn’t been sick. It would have been more fun.

Dear Amir (that’s my dog),

DON’T YOU EVER RUN OUT OF MY ROOM AND MAKE ME CHASE YOU FOR A MILE AROUND MY NEIGHBORHOOD, AS I TRY TO GET YOU BACK AND PROTECT YOU FROM GETTING HIT BY A CAR AGAIN.

THANKS!

oh yeah, so I’m back from Oregon.

Today was real bitter-sweet.

The Sweet:
+YOU GUYS EFFIN RULE!!! It was crazy to see everybody, I hadn’t seen Robin, Sarah, Steph, Derek, or Mike since the summer! It seems like I’ve seen Ramany a little bit more recently but I’m not sure, it was good to see her too though, obviously! And of course it was wonderful to see Dani and Christina again! Everybody looked so great.
+Heather rocks my socks. We had a terribly awesome pop punk moment in which we sang old songs from our youth, err…. the youth being 2-3 years ago.

The Bitter:
-gosh everything else. I have this issue with people showing up to work in a bad mood, it brings me down WAY a lot.
-random girls that I’ve never seen before hanging around. bothered me for reasons I’d rather not state.
-people asking me strange questions. I don’t mind but I wonder why they’re asking these questions.

Oh, here’s something else that was bitter-sweet, though it was from yesterday:

You can just see the excitement on my face in the moments before I got the crap poked out of my ear. It was a wierd moment. And you can see the result of the crap poking. It wasn’t actually too painful so maybe it was more sweet than bitter. But one of my friends is already saying that she wants to go and get the same piercing and it bothers me because it ruins the point of having a unique on going ear piercing project. Or something.

Sorry, right now I’m feeling bitter.

I need to pack, I’m going to Oregon on monday. I think that the trip is bothering me too. I don’t want to deal with picking a college. If I like it up there, it’ll suck because I’ll have to leave. If I hate it up there, it’ll suck because I’ll have to stay.

Now a moment inspired by the beautiful Marisa’s myspace, because somehow, the videos she puts up always end up representing how I am feeling at the time ♥ :

So if you want to be with me
With these things there’s no telling
We just have to wait and see
But I’d rather be working for a paycheck
Then waiting to win the lottery
Besides maybe this time is different
I mean I really think you like me.

Sup.

In an effort to take Ofelicious’s (Dani’s) advice, tomorrow (or I guess today… once I go to sleep and wake up) I am abandoning any thoughts on boys. In an effort to relieve stress. Because they are stressing me out. For stupid reasons that should not make me stress.

Instead I will allow myself to be stressed by the insane amount of homework I have left myself to do before 11 am tomorrow.

+ I got to talk more with Marisa today about the boyyyy situation
+ The new girl, Dani, is real cool
+ Amy’s a fun girl
+ I talked to Mike
- My conversation with Mike mostly had to do with getting him a cup of water
- I don’t know how quite how to act around him now, I suspect he might feel the same.
- I didn’t get to hang out after work with people because of school work
- For some reason I got annoyed with Mike. Basically, I’m stupid.
+ Ofy and Moodies came to visit me at work again! I made them “Chinese” tea.

Yeah, I’m dumb. Yeah, this entry sounds like it was written by a 14 year old.
Oh yeah. Nate and I officially broke up yesterday. It didn’t go so well, but it wasn’t as bad as it could have been either.

mike likes me.

for now i’m not going to focus on whether something will happen between us or not. there’s the issue of him being close friends with collin, there’s the issue that we’re both sort of fresh out of relationships that we’re still dealing with (like how i still need to break up with my boyfriend), and a few other issues as well.

for now all that i’m caring about is that he likes me and it’s nice to be liked back by somebody who you like and who happens to be one of the hottest guys that you’ve ever seen in real life.

i love dani and christina, thanks guys for coming by, it meant a lot! thanks for making me think my car got stolen, it was a proud moment of my evening!

i’ll make a better post sometime in the future.

oh and i think the two sort of dates are off for this weekend. but i don’t care, haha.

Life is so crazy right now, school is sort of just in the back of my mind. There’s a big chance that my gpa is going to take a big drop this semester.

Everything is so exciting though. I’ve formed new friendships with co-workers/customers at work and we all hang out a lot. Our lives are open books, lots of things get asked, and they all get answered. We don’t really have lives outside of work… there’s a few of us who just go in on our own time and sit around talking to people who we know, studying, and helping each other close up the store (even if we’re not getting paid for it right then), and then we go to denny’s afterwards. Today after denny’s we drove back to its a grind and tried driving each other’s cars. It was fun to try and show Jenn how to drive a stick, she was so proud of herself, it was hilarious.

I drove an old bug today. Oh em gee, hardest thing ever. It was funny because you could tell Collin didn’t want to let me drive it but he let me do it anyway and he was freaking out the whole time. But now I can say that I’ve driven an old bug without killing myself.

We had a chinese firedrill on our way back to IAG, good times.

Tomorrow I am hanging out with Marisa, and I’m excited, we don’t get to hang out and talk so much because of scheduling. I forsee us having a “fat day” involving delicious food and sitting around ♥ It will be awesome.

I’ve enjoyed getting to reconnect with friends. I’m trying to be a better friend.

Everything is fun, but at the same time, my parents are not so happy with me right now, and I’m worried of what their… “upsetness” with me will lead to in the near future. And school is sort of on the backburner. I have about 7 or 8 short-essays (2 pages each) to do for history, notes on 5 chapters for history, a midterm paper for history, a short essay for english, and a midterm essay for english. Half these things are overdue. A quarter are due tomorrow. The rest are due on tuesday. None of the things have been done yet. Crap and I have to read this crazy book for english too.

I’m lost at sea,
The radio is jamming but they wont find me,
I swear its for the best
And then your frequency is pulling me in closer
Til I’m home.

Crawl, theres things that aren’t worth giving up I know.
When you can’t bear to carry me I’ll fight.
You live the life you’re given with the storms outside somedays all I do is watch the sky,
Today was a good day, today was a good day.

sorry for the livejournal overkill lately.

A break from school would be so amazing right now. oh, wait, I guess I am getting one. I need the summer though. 10 weeks left till then? I just need to pick it up until that time. But the thought of just having work and play, and not having to worry about school for three months?!? It kills me that I have to wait till then. I want to take a semester off. Problem is that I will never go back to school and I’ll be a coffee shop person for my whole life. Okay, I seriously need to stop writing.

18 and invincible, can’t wait to screw this up.

I’m excited for warped tour this year! It’ll be back in long beach, and I will get to see the wonderful people in fall out boy, the starting line, senses fail, hawthorne heights, MXPX, matchbook romance, silverstien, tsunami bomb, strike anywhere, billy talent, underoath, the matches, HIPV, plain white t’s, waking ashland, and many other bands.

The first year was fun.

Last year there was only one band that I truly wanted to see.

This year will rule. I wish the early november was on it again though (they were the band I wanted to see last year). And where in the world has brand new been? They are the one band left on my original list of bands I must see live.

If I have you on myspace, I actually made a post there. Check it out. Or not, it’s really not too great, and I am aware, haha.

And suddenly I have two (sort of) dates this weekend? One real date and one ‘hanging out’ time. Oh man, what am I getting myself into? I’m freaking out. Shoot.

Days like today make me love work and hate work so much, all at the same time.

We had the best music, a packed house… no sitting or standing room, and outside was real busy too. The first few hours of the music were fun, we were just dancing behind the counter and made like 2 million raspberry kisses (we’re supposed to sell as many as possible), but by the end of the night I was incredibly worn out. The music didn’t stop till a while after we closed and it took us forever to rearrange the furniture. Luckily the guys came to our rescue, they always do. I feel bad that they do so many of the things we’re supposed to do in closing. But I’m glad that they all stick around, in a way it makes me feel a lot safer, especially since it’s usually just me and another girl closing.

After 8 hours of standing up without a break, my legs were going to die, my head was hurting, and I seriously felt like I would pass out. The funny thing is that Jenn acts like the mother figure and always makes me drink water and eat something. And that something always ends up not being the white chocolate chip cookies that accidentally “break,” but something that she sends one of the guys to pick up from next door at vons. Today it was tomato soup. I feel so taken care of at work, I love that about it.

I think I like one of the regulars at work. The only problem is that the one I like probably doesn’t like me, and the one I’d rather just be friends with likes me a lot. He’s real nice though. And deep. And a year older, not younger. He asked me to a concert and apparently it was supposed to be a date but I was too dumb to realize that. I thought it was just trying to get rid of an extra ticket or something. So maybe he does like me.

But even if he does like me, it’s too soon. I need to be honest with myself and realize that I need to get to know myself more before I start to associate myself so closely with somebody else.